Fuzzy Cushions

Sometimes the only way to deal with a thing is to wedge your whole face in between two fuzzy cushions and wait for things to improve:

This is something I can appreciate. Kayloo is a smart dog.

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The New Yorker Has Gone to the Dogs

99.99% of the time I have no idea what in the hell is going on with the front cover of the New Yorker. Waaaaaaaaaaay over my head. Way. They are all cerebral and smart and clever... and I don't get them (yes, I do realize what this says about me). This one, however, I think I get:

It's cold! And there's snow everywhere! And even our dogs are cold!

... Or maybe it's some kind of commentary on the state of our society spending precious cash-ola on dog cloths in this economy...? Is the New Yorker making fun?

Okay, once again completely in the dark where I suppose I should be when it comes to the New Yorker.

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Your Mother Is Not Impressed, Playgirl

So, this whole thing about Mike Vick posing for Playgirl with the proceeds going to PETA (read the Life & Style article). In case you haven't heard: Playgirl offered to donate $1 million to PETA if Michael Vick poses for it's magazine.

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

This is the worst idea ever:

1. Guy tortures animals (he started his dogfighting operation, "Bad Newz Kennels" in 2001)
2. Guy is sentenced to 23 months followed by 2 months in home confinement
3. Guy strips for a skin mag
4. Skin mag makes a bunch of money

I'm going to throw this out there again: ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

Yeah sure, they say they are going to give a donation to PETA, but that does not make any of this okay (whatever you happen to think of PETA). My issue here is with a publication wanting to profit off of what Vick has done. I have the sneaking suspicion the magazine stands to make a bunch of  money off of this and is doing this for a bunch of free press (yes, I do realize that I am giving said publication free press by writing this post, which is totally annoying but the whole thing really pisses me off so I am going to keep going).

Somebody woke up and thought: Hmmm. How can we get a bunch of press focused onto Playgirl and hopefully make a bunch of money in the process? I KNOW! Let's get someone who hurt voiceless animals... and then let's turn it around to make it sound like WE are the good guys by turning part of that income into a donation.

To that somebody: Not a nice idea. Your mom would not be proud.

I don't know about you guys, but for some reason I am not turned on by animal torturers ("former" yeah, yeah, yeah). I am also not turned on by magazines that seek to benefit/make light of former animal torturers.

As far as I've read PETA has nothing to do with this. Playgirl came up with this one all on their own.

WOW, what a downer! Okay. Here is a cute/bored picture of Mickey in an attempt to lighten things up after all that griping. Ta da!

My Happy Place

That is my husband. Those are my dogs. The sun is shining.

Things are good.

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Good Bye to Daddy Millan

On Friday, February 19th Daddy, Cesar Millan's loyal sidekick and Canine Assistant Extraordinaire passed away at the age of 16 years (you can post your condolences on Daddy's Memorium page here).

I didn't know Daddy, I don't know the Millan's, but I am sitting here bawling my eyes out because I can't imagine what they are going through right now. My heart truly goes out to them.

There is a section on saying good bye to your best buddy in "Be the Pack Leader." And it made me cry. I tried to cry quietly so I wouldn't wake John up, who was sound asleep beside me, and have to explain the reason I was snotting all over the sheets. Because I was crying for a whole bunch of reasons and it felt too dismal to explain.

I was crying because the thought of saying good bye was sad. Because sometimes saying good bye is the only right thing to do and sometimes doing the right thing is HARD. Because sometimes things happen that change you forever and most of the time you don't have control over those things.

Loving friends is amazing. Losing friends is impossible. Both inevitably happen... and your only option, really, is to hug harder, laugh more... and let your dogs cuddle with you on the couch every now and then even if they're not allowed. Kind of another "life is shit/life is amazing" thing, I guess.

I'd say my dogs will be allowed on the couch and the bed and everything else today.

To the Millans: I am so very sorry for your loss. Take care.

Vancouver Photo Medley

I mentioned in my horoscope post that I headed over to Vancouver a couple of weeks ago. Here's a bunch of pics cuz, yet again, my brain is too dang mushy to get it together and be properly witty for y'all.

It was before the Olympics started but ooooh the Olympics buzz was in the air! Lots of "I Heart Canada" stuff to spend your cash-ola on:

I'm not sure if these were put up before all the Olympics started, but these eagles are pretty westcoast-ish:

I took the ferry over and hanging over the side of the ferry to take photos frickin' frickin' FRICK frick scares the crap out of me because of the WATER and the DARK CHURNING WATER and the HAIRY HUNGRY WATER BEASTS WAITING TO CHEW MY SHOES OFF:

... and a close up of a wall... just cuz...

... and more Olympics...

Happy Friday! Have a blast this weekend!

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An Olympic Leap For Noodle Head

Here we have Kayloo on Rock #1:

And here we have Kayloo on Rock #2:

These photos probably don't seem ALL that interesting, but I had to share them with you guys because it took a BLOODY LONG TIME to get these shots. And NOT because I had to snap so many photos.

Oh no.

It's because Kayloo thinks she is as wee as a can of tomato soup and that her little ol' four-left-pawed self was embarking on an epic leap across the English Channel.

She seemed quite pleased with her feat. Well done, Noodle Head (that is one of her nicknames. Nope. Dunno why).

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Crabby Crab

I went to Vancouver a couple weeks ago for a family emergency (everything is okay) and in order to get there I hung out on public transport for many-an-hour. Which meant I got to do cool things like people watch, chow down on a gooey chocolate bar for breakfast (you're allowed to do that when you're traveling, oh-yes-you-are-trust-me), and... wait for it...

READ THE PAPER.

The whole thing. Oooooooooooooh... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh.

This was my horoscope for the day. I am a Cancer. I just googled my crabby self and turns out I'm a homebody. I'm moody, I'm resistant to change and I have a thick shell.

WHO THE HELL DOES THE WRITE UP FOR THESE THINGS? Maybe I should start all my intro's with, "Hello, how do you do? My name is Shauna, RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE before I bitch your head off you and make you stay in my HOME while I do it."

Aside from that, I liked this horoscope. Made me smile. I have lots to be thankful for. And I did write up a list as I slowly made my way to Vancouver. I won't write it out here lest I gross you out with the goopiness of it all. But suffice to say I have lots of reasons to say Thank you. Every. Single. Day.

Thank you!

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Bright Pink Prizes and Little Brown Dogs

I've been entering a bunch of contests lately because... well, basically because I want to see if I will win. Does that sound weird? In addition to wanting to win I want to SEE if I will win because THAT IS A TOTALLY DIFFERENT THING.

Yes it is. Work with me.

Long story short... I WON SOME CUTE LITTLE DOG BONE SOAPS FROM PHETCHED (go to phetched to check out what they look like)!

Thank you phetched! Go on over to phetched because they have fun stuff and, clearly, contests. That are winnable. Which are the best kind.

FULL DISCLOSURE: This prize DID NOT come with the little brown dog pictured with the bright pink gift above. The little brown dog was already mine. For  better or worse, the little brown dog is mine.

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Stuff My Dogs Have Wrecked: Remote Control

Back in the day when my dogs were really, really bad, they gnawed on the remote control, notably the power button. Now the TV turns on at random times, like in the MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, which is a pain because the TV popping on throws me into confused, half-awake freak-outs:

Me: John! Wake up! WAKE UP! A burgular has broken into the house and is downstairs watching Friends!!! Tell that asshole to turn it down and to stop laughing at the dumb parts.

Being the uber-romantic I am, I got John a replacement remote control for Valentine's Day. Don't judge me, that is what he asked for. In an attempt to take this practical gift from "heh?" to "YOWZA!" I decided to make a chocolate cake that LOOKED like a remote control. How clever is that? An edible remote control. Brilliant.

Except it turned out like this:

I'm not sure what that looks like. R2D2 maybe? Am I insulting R2D2?

Sorry, dude.

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Happy Super Wicked Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's, you guys!

It has been a super, wicked week over here at Fido & Wino.

Super. And wicked.

And CAN YOU SEE HOW FREAKING CUTE MICKEY LOOKS IN THIS PHOTO? Ah Mickey. Every now and then he redeems himself.

So, super fun stuff this week:

• Fido & Wino hung out over at the Petfinder blog with the Top 10 Reasons a Dog Makes the Best Valentine's Date

I am sure there are actually around 183 reasons dogs make wicked dates but I could only think of 10 at the time I wrote that post. I'll do better next time.

And...

• Kayloo passed her Therapy Dog test!

This means Kayloo is good sometimes. We are very proud of the little squirt. These extended care facilities will never be the same again.

Happy Friday, people! Happy Weekend! Happy Valentine's Day!

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Top Ten Reasons a Dog Makes the Best Valentine's Day Date

This is an excerpt from the Fido & Wino Guest Blogger post on the Petfinder.com Blog.

As Valentine's Day approaches you could be thinking a couple of things. Maybe you're contentedly daydreaming about perforated paper bunny cards, too-hot cinnamon hearts and the various secret admirers you are sure to have doting on you this year.

Or perhaps you are thinking, "Ugh."

You're not alone...

[Click over to the Petfinder.com Blog to read all the fabulousness!]

PS: That super cute little Pekingese is named Snuggles and is available for adoption on Petfinder.com! So go to Petfinder.com! Go now! (photo credits to Petfinder.com)

PPS: Petfinder.com rocks! I am so excited to be included on their blog! Because of them I found Kayloo. Yeah Petfinder!

PPPS: Um. So are you going to go over to Petfinder.com now, or what?... just checking...

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8AM on a Saturday (!!!) Morning

Early morning walk before Kayloo's (successful! BOO YA!) Therapy Dog test.

8am on a Saturday morning is damn early, people. Damn early.

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Therapy Dog in the House!!!

ShweeeEEEEeee! Kayloo passed her Therapy Dog Test!!!!

(If you're reading for the first time, I wax on about this crazy test here and here).

Look at Miss Kayloo, lookin' all dignified and important in her snappy 'kerchief! Who knew they would give her her own parking spot?

And now I need to level with you: HOLY CRAP I AM SO GLAD THAT IS OVER.

I know this wasn't ABOUT me, but HOLY smokes, I was nervous. Okay, it was kind of about me because if she had failed it wouldn't have been HER fault. It would have been MY fault for being a spazz and stressing her out (Patch O' Pits and Barbara have very good points in the Comments section on this post).

It was quite a day. The test started at 10:30am and the dogs and I were up and at the park by 7:45am. The plan was to give Kayloo enough time to nap before heading out to the test. But, for the first time in her life Kayloo DID NOT NAP. Hu? Next to chewing on Mickey's ears and eating, sleeping is pretty much Kayloo's favourite past time. But no. Apparently not on Test Day.

As a direct result of the marathon morning, while we were impatiently quietly waiting for one of our test sets, Kayloo woefully crooned this "yeeow-eeow-eeeow" noise. Translation= Deep slumber about to commence in 5, 4, 3, 2....

I started to write this very blog post you're reading now in my head: Well, we gave it our best shot folks, but the evaluator said she wouldn't evaluate a dog that was UNCONSCIOUS.

I managed to coax Kayloo onto her feet and off we trotted across the sunlit auditorium to prove she wasn't going to turn into a Red Zone Psycho Beast in the presence of another dog. She managed to get through the exercise fine, but after we sashayed across the floor she dramatically slumped into a sit, huffed a big sigh of exhaustion, and continued to theatrically flop out into a full-on snooze-sprawl with an unmistakable Wake-Me-When-Dinner's-Ready look of contentment.

Much to the entertainment of the other Therapy Dog Wannabees in the room. OH SURE NOW SHE WANTS TO SLEEP.

Maybe we got extra points for entertainment value?

In any case, SHE MADE IT! Zooming wheelchairs didn't faze her, 1/2 dozen excited hands patting her made her beam and her easy going temperment shined through. I AM SO EXCITED TO GET STARTED!

I'm not going to lie, I was bragging at the dog park this morning:

Me: Yeah, my dog is a Therapy Dog. Pre-tty big deal.

Them: Oh yeah.

Me: Big test, BIG TEST. Big, big, big.

Them: Hmmm...

Me: Gave her her own parking spot...

Thank you guys for being so encouraging! I've really been looking forward to sharing this exciting news with you and I will definitely keep you posted on all the shenanigens she is sure to get up to "on the job."

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Positively Thrilled and Burnt Cliffs

I took this photo last weekend; the last weekend of January 2010. I love how the brush  looks like it's burnt and Kayloo and Mickey looked positively thrilled to be a part of it all.

Two years ago I didn't have dogs. I don't think I noticed things like rusty crimson cliffs and how beautiful a tree looks balancing beside a dilapidated old barn.

If I did, surely I didn't appreciate all this quirky wonderfulness nearly enough. 

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1/2 Week to the Therapy Dog Test!

Okay guys! Kayloo's Therapy Dog test is this weekend. We are DOWN TO THE FINAL STRETCH!

We just got back from a wonderful walk. An AMAZING walk. Dare I say a THERAPY DOG TEST ACING WALK!!!

No, I don't dare say that... I'm a wimp... I take it back... Quick somebody throw some salt over your shoulder or give me a rabbit's foot OR SOMETHING (actually, don't with the rabbit's foot, I think that is probably horribly cruel and as you can clearly see I can't afford to carry around ANY bad karma with me at this particular juncture thankyouverymuch).

I've been checking out the Canine Good Citizen requirements and I think we're mostly okay on most of the tests:

• Test 1: Accepting a friendly stranger- I think we'll be okay here because Kayloo thinks almost everyone is her new best friend. It's a little of: HI! Oh my god, I love you! I'm so lucky to meet you... and OH! You too! Come a little closer so we can attach at the hip. It says however that she isn't allowed to "break position." If the "position" happens to be threading her tongue up into the evaluators nose, we should be fine.
• Test 2: Sitting politely for petting- I'm concerned about the "polite" part, but she will be all over someone oozing attention all over her.
• Test 3: Appearance and grooming- Kayloo's hot. Check. Check. Check.
• Test 4: Out for a walk- She is doing much MUCH better, but she is not perfect. She'll be in a completely new place so she will be very curious.
• Test 5: Walking through a crowd- She's usually pretty great about this, unless one of the people in the crowd has a skateboard. If someone has a skateboard she may stop and tilt her head this way and that way and thiswayandthatwayand... forever and ever until the evaluator falls asleep and/or kicks us out.
• Test 6: Sit down on command and staying in place- We should be good here.
• Test 7: Coming when called- No problem (unless some sly dog has a steak behind his back. Then we're toast).
• Test 8: Reaction to another dog- Kayloo will be fairly interested in the other dog. The plan is to have her good and played out before the test, but it is very unlikely she would walk away from an opportunity for a good hearty "get all up in your grill" bum sniff.
• Test 9: Reaction to distraction- There will be lots of head tilting.
• Test 10: Supervised separation- Apparently we won't be tested on this, but if we were Kayloo would be like, "Hey, where did that blonde- HEY NEW PERSON I LOVE YOU, WHO ARE YOU?!!!"

Kayloo will do just fine. If not, we can always take the test again, right? RIGHT?! Just kidding, I'm actually not freaking out that much. The only way Kayloo can do well is if I am nice and chill so please send lots and lots o' chill vibes our way in the days leading up to having a total kanipshin doing our very best.

Thank you, much!

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